Attachment patterns aren’t diagnoses—they’re ways our nervous systems learned to keep us safe. This quick, reflective quiz can help you notice themes in how you seek closeness, ask for space, and repair after conflict. If anything here lands hard, go gently.

How to use this quiz

  • Option 1: Answer 12 short statements (1–5).

  • Option 2: If you already tallied scores from a worksheet, enter your four totals (Anxious, Avoidant, Disorganized, Secure) and click Check my result.
    You’ll get a kind, plain-language summary—never a label that boxes you in.

Attachment Style Quiz

This quick, reflective quiz can help you notice patterns in relationships. It isn’t a diagnosis—just information. Go gently.

Rate each statement from 1 (Not at all true) to 5 (Very true).

1) I worry my partner will lose interest or leave.
2) I think about my relationships a lot and read into small changes.
3) It’s hard to relax until I feel reassured in the relationship.
4) I value independence and pull away when things get too close.
5) I prefer solving things on my own rather than relying on others.
6) Too much emotional need from others makes me shut down.
7) I want closeness but also feel wary or unsafe when it’s offered.
8) I feel “all or nothing” in relationships—pursue then retreat.
9) Trust is hard; I look for danger even when I want connection.
10) I’m generally comfortable asking for support when I need it.
11) I can be close and independent without a lot of drama.
12) When conflict happens, I can repair and reconnect in time.

Your reflective result

Attachment Wounds Support Couples Therapy Individual Therapy

This quiz is informational and not a diagnosis. If you’re in distress, please reach out for support.

What your result means (and doesn’t)

Your result is informational, not a diagnosis. Patterns can shift over time and across relationships. Therapy focuses less on “what style am I?” and more on what helps you feel safer, clearer, and more connected right now.

Gently moving toward “earned secure”

If your patterns lean anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, we can work on:

  • Steadying the nervous system so closeness/space feel safer

  • Clear bids & boundaries that honour your needs and relationships

  • Repair skills for when conflict or distance happens

  • Self-trust—a grounded inner voice that’s kind and reliable

Ready to talk to someone?

If you want support integrating what you learned, I offer calm, collaborative therapy in Guelph and online across Ontario.

Book a 15 minute consultation

 FAQs

  • No. It’s a reflection tool. Therapy can help you apply insights in real life.

  • Yes. With practice and safe relationships, many people move toward more secure patterns over time.

  • That’s common. Many people show a blend. In therapy we focus on specific moments—what helps you feel safer and clearer.

  • Go slowly, take breaks, and skip anything that feels too activating. We can always pace this work together in session.

  • Yes. I use EFT-informed work to slow conflict cycles and practice safer connection.